[music] Hey excuse me.
Hey, how are you doing? Hey, can you tell me where the
Under Armour Coldblack golf gear is? Yeah, I just moved out
here, and I haven’t had a chance to unpack
my golf stuff, so I’m kinda looking for some, shirts. Wow, are you– Tom Brad… –from Boston? Your accent… (accent) Hey, where’s
the Under Armour. I don’t have a Boston
accent. I play football in Boston, but– I’m sorry man, but
I can’t understand a word you’re saying. You’re like, “Hey, what
do you mean?” “I ain’t got no
Boston accent.” Just say something, and
I’ll spitball with you. No, I really don’t
want to do that. (accent) Go Sox! (accent) Hey, that’s some wicked
hot chowder. What? I’m doing an impersonation
of you. I’m an actor. I don’t even sound
like that. You sound a lot…
You sound like that. I sound nothing
like that. I beg to differ. (accent) You really just got to
try the lobster. Is there anyone else
that can help me? No. (accent) You know, Marky
Mark and the Funky Bunch, now that’s a good band.
You know a band I love more? (accent) Boston. I’m actually from
San Mateo, so I don’t– Oh, San Mateo,
Massachusetts? That’s really funny.
Actually there’s a San Mateo here in
California. I got to show people… Hey everybody, get a load
of this Boston guy. Please don’t do that.
Please, quiet. Well they should hear you. You.
You. Play football. No, fly from Boston. No. Why would you
even say that? Man. Yeah, yeah, your
accent is ridiculous. Get a picture of
me and this nut Judia. Okay, say
“Bostonian” goofball. Bostonian. Hey, are you
Matt Damon? No. Oh, I knew it.
Affleck. Ooh (giggles). Oh my God. Hey man, you must get
so hot here all the time right, because your
blood’s thicker? You want me to grab
you some water? (accent) Water? No.
No. How about some
baked beans? No. You know why?
Because I’m not from Boston. I’m from California! I’m a native
Californian. I went to Michigan, and
now I play for New England. I’m the (bleep)
quarterback you moron. (sigh) You know, you look a
lot like that standee. Yeah, it’s uncanny. – Tom: Him?
– Store Clerk: Yeah. Well, you don’t need
go knocking it over like that. I am the guy on the standee. (accent) I am the guy on
the friggin’ standee. Uh!
Oh my… Matt Damon, shame
on you! He lost his wife
in those Bourne movies, but I don’t feel bad
for him at all. I’m going to go kick
that guys butt. Well, you look like
a reader. Maybe you need
some help. Go help him honey. You can’t treat
people like that. Yeah. I take a
Zumba class. I can dance
kick him. [music]